Thursday, May 29, 2008

What's Your Opinion?

OK - So we all know that my brother recently got married and that I'm in my best friend Erika's wedding next month.Well, my friends and I were chatting at work yesterday about the appropriate amount that should be given when you attend a wedding.. One of my co-workers is going to a wedding Saturday night - this sparked a conversation! We had TOTALLY different ideas about the proper gift amount - they said I give WAY to much $$..
So my question is this - what do you feel is a proper or appropriate amount that should be given for a wedding gift? I know it varies for family members or how close of a relationship you have with the person getting married; but I just wanted other opinions on this topic!

15 comments:

Brunhilda said...

I've heard about $50, if possible, and I think more for someone you're very close to (but maybe not if you're doing other things like being in the wedding). I think that young people know that not everyone can swing that much money, though.

Katelin said...

This is my first year of being invited to weddings that aren't family (3 to be exact) and I spend about 50 on one since I'm not going to it. And the second one I'm actually in it, but I'm splitting it with some people and will probably spend about 60 and the third one is local so I'm not sure. I will probably split it again at about 50. I guess it just depends on how close you are to the person getting married and how much you can spend, haha.

Lori said...

I think it depends on the relationship with the couple. for someone I'm just an "sort of friendly" with I usually do about $50

Christy said...

No more than $50.

Pam said...

it varies so much based on your relationship with the person....but I think that around $50 is okay- a little more, a little less. I think it also depends on what is going on with you at the time- sadly, once I could only give $25 as a gift....it was honestly all I could afford at the time.

Anonymous said...

I think $50 for friends...family can be more, though!

Seriously, Dana...???How do you know about Daily Tea when you don't have kids yet? You crack me up!

Auburn Kat said...

I usually spend about $50 for friends and more for really close friends and relatives. You also have to think about the other costs, like if you are going to have to fly, stay in a hotel, etc.

Mama Smurf said...

I have a very specific formula....I don't know why....I don't know how I came up with this formula...it's just something I've always done. I find out the cost of my plate...say the hall charges $40/plate...I give that amount plus $25 per person that is attending the reception and then round up to the nearest $25. So if my husband and I are attending the reception together and the plates are $40 a piece...I give $150.

I think at the very least you should give enough to cover the cost of your plate. Just my opinion.

Marni's Organized Mess said...

What do you give? Typically I say $50, but it also depends on how much you spend to get there, be IN the wedding and who it is. I know, not a help.

PS. I tagged you for a Meme, come and check it out and see if you want to play!

Marni

AlasMyDear said...

i'm sure it's different in my culture...because being invited to a wedding usually means a 9-course dinner at a fancy hotel! we usually give $100 per head. that works out to about USD70? more if it's a close friend, of course.

weddings are hard on the wallet, so we have to be picky about which ones we go to!

Danielle said...

I give $250 to close friends and $200 to everyone else. If we really are not close to someone we give $100.

Future Mom (Heather) said...

I have also been told we give a lot compared to most people our age for weddings, baptism, etc. We must both be super generous!! The thing that really makes a difference is that we are in the NY/NJ area & people here spend way more on weddings than in the south, midwest or other areas.

Luckily now that we are married, it is much easier to decide what to give someone because I look up what they gave me & return the generosity back to them.

Personally, I wouldn't give less than $200 for myself & the hubby attending a friend's wedding. If we are really good friends then it goes up. If we aren't really friendly with the person we won't go.

I think it really depends on the wedding and the person. I have received $1000 from some couples and also $50 from some couples for our wedding.

EP said...

Umm, good question. I had a friend who got married in March, and I was invited to THREE showers. Each gift was about $20, totalling up to $80, which I think was WAY too much since I didn't have any money to begin with.

But I think you should give whatever amount makes you feel comfortable.

Anonymous said...

I have read that you should give at least what your meal is costing. So, if they are paying $40 per person... and you are bringing a date- you should be giving at least $80. I read that in some etiquette thing. And that is the least you should give. For family- probably a lot more.

Mamarazzi said...

here is my rule. if i am in the wedding and have already spent money for a dress, shoes, spa experience, shower, etc. i give $100. if i am NOT in the wedding i give $200. IF it is just a coworker or associate i toss them $50 and think to myself they should consider themselves lucky!